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MARI SUGGS 

Our Feelings Are Driven By Two Things

When I first started on my self-development journey, I was surprised to learn that our lives are driven by two things that evoke strong feelings: love or fear. 

How do we know if what we’re feeling is coming from love or fear? Well, these are some of the feelings associated with love:

Joy
Compassion
Generosity
Patience

 

While these feelings are associated with fear:
Guilt
Hate
Jealousy
Resentment

At every moment we are feeling something, therefore, it's important to be in tune with what we're feeling. For example, if we're feeling any one of the emotions listed under love, it means, that moment or desire is being driven by love. When this is the case, we’re okay to keep feeling what we're feeling. But when we're making decisions or living our lives guided by the emotions under fear, that's when an adjustment is necessary. 

The problem is that we don’t set out to feel guilt, hate, greed, jealousy, or resentment; but sometimes these emotions are easier to feel than those derived out of love, depending on the problem-at-hand.  

This is what you must understand about emotions; our emotions are a product of our past experiences or the perceived perception of what's yet to happen.  If a particular past memory happened to be a pleasant one, then, we probably feel any one of the emotions that stem out of love. Furthermore, if we can attach this positive memory to something we desire in the future, then we probably will have positive feelings when we envision the future. For example, if you have a positive experience with moving, then every time you think about moving, whether in the past or the future, then the emotions you generate will probably be those associated with love. The problem occurs when the opposite is true. A negative encounter in the past can cause you to live with feelings associated with fear. 

A quick remedy to this is to stop living in the past and/or future: we can’t control either. The only time we have control over is, NOW. At this moment we have the option to choose how we’re going to feel about a given subject. At this moment we can choose to look at a problem from a place of love or a place of fear. This is the beauty of being a human being, free will-- in all terms. Even if someone has hurt us badly, we have the option to choose how that person’s actions will affect our lives. We can choose to forgive, to feel joy-- despite them. Or we can feel anger and resentment. It’s all up to us!

Till Next Time!

 

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