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mari suggs

Wife, Mother, Author and Blogger of Life

Why Looking for External Approval Kills Your Dreams

June 20, 2017

I just started listening to “Kevin Hart’s” new book I Can’t Make This Up: Life Lessonsand so far, so good. There are many quotable phrases in the book, but one stood out to me this week: “Stop looking for external approval, when you already have internal approval.”

Perhaps the reason this phrase resonates so much with me is because I often find myself looking for other’s approval.  This pretty much translates to pleasing other’s in an effort to live a guilt-free life. This means that I try my best to not rock the boat in any way, shape, or form—a people-pleaser of sorts. Everyone’s needs come before mine because their approval means more to me than my own internal guide.

However, as I continue to grow and learn, I’ve realized that I no longer want to live like that. I want to release my need for the approval, and to recognize that mine is all I need. Doing this is not easy, for I’ve discovered that it too, comes with its own wave of guilt. Knowing that something is right for you, but it doesn’t play into the plans the others have for you, and still you do it anyway, is a difficult decision to make, but it’s one that must be made if your goal is to live as close to your authentic-self as possible.

When we seek external approval, we’re only trying to smother the inner voice that is trying to move us into our destiny. For example, if you want to start a new business, but this requires you to trust and quit your day-job, perhaps your first thought is to go to others and tell them about your new dream in hopes of finding their approval—your green light. Instead, you’re met with naysayers and all the reasons why you’re crazy for even considering it. So now, instead of listening to that inner voice, you back out of your idea because it’s more important to you that others approve of your choices, than it is for you to listen to your internal calling.  

If you find yourself amid such a dilemma, I’m here to encourage you to let your voice be louder than those that fear your growth. Your inner voice derives from love and is always leading you in the right direction. Don’t suffocate it to please others. It’s your life, now go live it—no external approval needed.

 

A few little announcements:

June's GIVEAWAY is She Means Business by Carrie Green Sign up for my mailing list for your chance to win. Good Luck! 

Also, my new book, #Believe Dammit: 10 Principles for Attracting and Creating The Life You Crave, comes out September 26, 2017. I will let you know when it's available for Preorder.

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If you loved this, then check out these:

Thursday Words: Believe In Yourself 

How to Feel Fear and Still Do It Anyway

 

Till next time

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Very well said. We all struggle to try and please other sometimes, but it is only when we do things for ourselves that we actually please the people around us. Good article.



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